Settling In

It feels like it's been a while since I've posted. I think that's because my days are still sort of hard. The weekends are great. But the minute Ryan leaves for work on Monday morning, I sort of sulk. You've already seen our view... it's amazing. I sit there and think, why am I not motivated to go out - it's beautiful?!? These long, expansive days should feel liberating. I can do anything. But instead, for the moment, they feel daunting.

I tend to do things with full force, and I feel I did that with work for the last six years. You underestimate how much of your self-worth comes from succeeding, getting positive feedback whether it be from clients or coworkers, making money, and having respect from your husband and family partly because of what you accomplished. Let me not get ahead of myself... I was an account manager not a brain surgeon. But I felt good at it.

So, yesterday I went to visit one of my options - a graduate program at Universita della Svizzera Italiana (www.usi.ch). I felt a rush that I haven't felt since we moved here. My hands are tied for the moment... we haven't received the proper paperwork that will dictate whether I can work, attend school, work and attend school (it's complicated). But, I got groceries that afternoon with a purpose! I went to every store trying to find the cheapest alarm clock like it was my job, and I liked it! The lesson I've learned is that I need something, and even the possibility of something makes me happy. So, with this promise of purpose, I can write and tell you about laundry and not cry, like I have been the last couple of days. So here goes.

Laundry is an issue. This is how it went on my first try. I put the clothes in, shut the door, and start pressing buttons. Not only is nothing happening, but no lights are coming on. I check for plugs in the back, run my fingers down the side in hopes of finding an on/off switch, all for naught. At this point I assume I'm just over thinking it, so I move on to the soap hoping the distraction will allow me to come back to the power issue with fresh focus. There's a pull out tray with 3 sections. I don't want to mess this one up so I find an instruction manual and start looking around. It's not in English (of course) but it does have pictures. I notice the soap is definitely going in the first tray - I can do that! Back to the power... I probably stared at the machine for a solid 5 minutes before thinking I should abort, take my clothes out, and do some research upstairs. I tried to open the door - guess what - doesn't work! Those of you with front loading machines probably know this, but there's no way to pull the door open, you have to press a button to make that happen. At this point there's a little panic. My clothes are held hostage and there's no one to consult. I start looking for buttons outside of the actual room (I'm desperate) and realize there's a dial right above the light switch. It's simple - goes from zero to one. I turn it to one, and just like that, the machine lights appear. So that was a lot harder than it had to be. I move on to cycle buttons and make best guesses. I decide to watch, just to make sure it's working before I leave. Sure enough, the clothes start tumbling. I feel I've done my job and head back upstairs. About an hour later I head down, open the door, and realize my clothes are dry. They've got some washing powder on them (thanks to my instruction manual skills) but they definitely weren't washed. It's at that point that I notice a water pipe above the machine with a drip pan underneath. I'm thinking, do you seriously have to turn the water on every time you do a load of laundry? The answer is yes. I turn on the spigot, water starts slowly dripping into the pan, and I reload the clothes for Act 2. With these I only wait 30 minutes before checking on them, just in case I've left out some other crucial thing like water. Not this time. In fact, I was so good with the water that I turned it on a little too much and it was over the drip pan, all over the top of the machine, and was running down the sides to the floor. I'm not one for expletives but you know how they say "when in Rome?" Well, "when in Switzerland" you flood your new apartment complex trying to do the simplest of tasks, you say crap a lot. Luckily, growing up in New Orleans, I have practice with floods. It was one of those "pick up, the water just reached the mailbox" moments. I went for anything on the floor - got them to higher ground. Next, I notice a drain in the middle of the room (someone must have done this before) so I take a towel and start shoveling the water towards the drain. I put more clothes around the bottom of the washing machine hoping to soak up any puddles underneath. I eventually got things under control, and by my second load knew just how much water was needed from the hose to make the wash. There's no dryer in our building so we have to hang the clothes either in the drying room (which was full) or on our balcony. Once this ordeal was finally over, I was so proud I took a picture. These days, this is what success looks like. Isn't it beautiful?